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Posts Tagged ‘divorce rates’

 Counseling should obviously be sought when the individual have selected a companion and the decisions to get married by both the individuals have been finalized, so that the benefits can be accrued by both the partners in their future married life.   The psychologists recommend seeking counseling:

  • When both the partners are very young and have never been married. ( of course both have   to take decision to get  married only at the legal marriage age allowed by the law of the land )
  • When the commitment for marriage cannot be taken with an open mind and the decision leads to fears and phobia in the individual’s mind.
  •  When the decision involves many issues related to   religion, culture, family ,  economic, social background, income, , parenting, household responsibility, work, job, career ambitions,  physical intimacy, sex, companionship, privacy, loss of independence etc.
  • When any of the near relatives, parents, siblings, have been through a bad marriage in the family.
  • When either or both partners have had a failed marriage before and have been through a trauma of legal divorce.
  • When the family pressures conflict with personal reasons and attitude.
  •   When the individual have been a victim of childhood abuse or domestic violence.
  • When individual has other reasons that could create conflicting situations with either of the spouse or other near and dear ones.

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Stress and strains in Preparing for a new relationship:  we as individual live in a predetermined, self imposed self selected privacy as we go about our daily living in families and in various roles of society. Yet within this privacy we do have the necessary social interaction and relationships.   Marital counseling can help the couple develop a relationship that has the inbuilt system of allowing space to both the spouses and yet bring about the required intimacy for enjoying the new relationship.  The couple should evolve like two full grown flowers that spread a common fragrance of love and affection and yet appear beautiful in their own individual identity.    Every couple knows that their Dedication to Marriage will build stronger relationships.  Their dedication towards each other will bring about a strong love for each other, a sense of humor, willingness to grow up together, necessary strength for working towards a common cause, shared and tolerance for each other’s religious and cultural beliefs, and commonality of life’s goals.  This dedication will be built upon love, affection, empathy, allowance, understanding, commitment, communication, friendship and of course yearning for companionship.  All these adjectives together make a beautiful garden known as the marriage. One such missing petal can cause the whole flowers fall apart hence the mental strength gained through pre marital counseling will provide the necessary feed, , sunlight   and the nurturing to the romancing couple and of course the bring down the ever rising divorce rate the world over.

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