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Questions to Ask Before Pre-Marital Counseling

April 29, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

Entering into marriage is a significant milestone in any couple’s life. As two individuals commit to sharing their lives together, it’s not uncommon for questions, doubts, and concerns to arise. Recognizing the importance of solidifying their foundation, many couples turn to pre-marital counseling to address these issues. However, before embarking on this journey, it’s essential for couples to understand what questions to ask their psychologist counselor.

1. What should we ask the counselor separately and as a couple?

Individual concerns and dynamics within the relationship are crucial aspects to address. Asking about the structure of counseling sessions and how they balance individual and joint discussions can help clarify expectations.

2. Does every couple need pre-marital counseling?

While it’s not a requirement for every couple, pre-marital counseling can offer invaluable insights and tools for navigating the challenges that may arise in marriage. Discussing whether it’s right for their specific situation is essential for couples to consider.

3. We’ve known each other for so long, why do we need counseling now?

Even couples with a long history may benefit from counseling. It provides an opportunity to explore aspects of the relationship that may not have been previously addressed and to ensure both partners are on the same page regarding their expectations for marriage.

4. Will counseling sessions be private, or will other couples be involved?

Understanding the format of counseling sessions is vital for couples’ comfort levels. Discussing preferences with the counselor can help tailor the experience to suit the couple’s needs.

5. Will our parents be involved in the counseling process?

While parental involvement is not typically a standard part of pre-marital counseling, some couples may choose to involve their parents in discussions about family dynamics or cultural expectations. Clarifying this with the counselor can help set boundaries and expectations.

6. How will counseling help us build a strong marital relationship?

Exploring the specific goals of counseling and the strategies the counselor employs can provide insight into how the process will benefit the couple. From communication skills to conflict resolution techniques, counseling offers practical tools for building a resilient partnership.

7. How many sessions will be necessary?

Understanding the time commitment required for counseling is essential for planning purposes. While the number of sessions can vary depending on the couple’s needs and goals, discussing a rough timeline with the counselor can help manage expectations.

Navigating the complexities of pre-marital counseling requires open communication and a willingness to address difficult questions. By engaging in this process, couples can lay the groundwork for a healthy and fulfilling marriage, equipped with the tools to overcome challenges and grow together.

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Premarital Counseling – Stress and Strains in Preparing for a New Relationship

April 24, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

Entering into a new relationship is akin to embarking on a journey filled with excitement, anticipation, and perhaps a touch of apprehension.

As individuals, we navigate through life’s roles and responsibilities, often enveloped within our self-imposed privacy within families and societal constructs. Preparing for a new relationship involves acknowledging and addressing the stress and strains inherent in our individual lives while nurturing the foundation for a fulfilling partnership.

Marital counseling emerges as a pivotal tool in this journey, offering couples a roadmap to create a relationship that harmonizes the need for personal space with the desire for intimacy. It serves as a guiding light, illuminating the path towards a bond characterized by mutual respect, understanding, and unwavering support. Through counseling, couples are encouraged to envision their relationship as two fully bloomed flowers, each exuding its unique fragrance of love and affection while coexisting in harmonious unity.

The journey of preparing for a new relationship is underpinned by a dedication to marriage—an unwavering commitment that serves as the bedrock upon which enduring love is built. This dedication transcends mere words, encompassing a myriad of qualities essential for a thriving partnership.

Love forms the cornerstone of this dedication, infusing every interaction with warmth and compassion. Humor acts as a balm, easing tensions and fostering a sense of joy in shared moments. Mutual growth becomes the guiding principle, as couples embark on a journey of self-discovery and evolution, hand in hand.

Resilience emerges as a defining trait, as partners navigate life’s inevitable challenges with unwavering strength and fortitude. Shared goals provide a common purpose, binding couples together in pursuit of a shared vision for their future. Respect for each other’s beliefs—be they religious, cultural, or personal—becomes non-negotiable, fostering an environment of acceptance and inclusion.

Communication serves as the lifeblood of the relationship, nurturing understanding and empathy between partners. Friendship blossoms alongside love, anchoring the relationship in a foundation of trust and camaraderie. And woven through it all is a profound yearning for companionship—a deep-seated desire to walk hand in hand through life’s journey, sharing its joys and sorrows as one.

In the intricate tapestry of marriage, each of these qualities acts as a thread, weaving together to form a beautiful garden of love and companionship. Yet, just as a single missing petal can cause a flower to wilt, the absence of any of these qualities can imperil the sanctity of the marital bond. It is here that the importance of pre-marital counseling becomes abundantly clear.

Pre-marital counseling serves as a nurturing force, providing couples with the tools and insights necessary to weather life’s storms and emerge stronger together. It offers a safe space for couples to explore their hopes, fears, and aspirations, laying the groundwork for open and honest communication. Through guided exercises and discussions, couples are empowered to confront potential areas of conflict, fostering a deeper understanding of each other’s needs and desires.

Moreover, pre-marital counseling equips couples with invaluable coping strategies, enabling them to navigate the inevitable challenges that arise in any relationship. Whether it be financial stresses, family dynamics, or personal differences, couples emerge from counseling with a newfound sense of resilience and unity.

Crucially, pre-marital counseling addresses the root causes of marital discord, thereby serving as a potent deterrent against the rising tide of divorce. By fostering a culture of introspection and communication, counseling empowers couples to confront issues head-on, rather than allowing them to fester and grow unchecked. In doing so, it not only strengthens individual relationships but also contributes to the collective fabric of society, reducing the prevalence of fractured families and broken homes.

In conclusion, the journey of preparing for a new relationship is one fraught with both excitement and uncertainty. Yet, through the guidance of pre-marital counseling, couples can navigate this journey with confidence and grace. By cultivating a relationship grounded in love, respect, and understanding, couples lay the foundation for a partnership that will endure the test of time.

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Understanding Anxiety in Children

April 22, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

There’s a common misconception that children can easily bounce back from anxiety, often by receiving positive reinforcement, treats like chocolate, gifts, or by distracting them with video games. However, anxiety doesn’t affect children in the same way as it does adults. It can manifest in various forms such as panic attacks, tantrums, sudden bursts of energy, or defiant behavior. Unfortunately, as parents, we sometimes overlook these signs, attributing them to mere misbehavior or peer influence. Yet, children’s reactions are influenced by their immediate circumstances, past experiences, and future expectations.

As psychologists, counselors, and family therapists, we frequently encounter parents and family members of our clients who grapple with anxiety. Interestingly, even in families with good parental coordination, children may also struggle with anxiety.

Some parents choose to conceal their own anxieties and issues from their children, attempting to maintain a façade of normalcy. However, children are perceptive and can pick up on anxiety cues through verbal and nonverbal communication, parental mood swings, or even by witnessing family events. Consequently, children may develop anxiety or panic attacks in response.

In cases where parents argue or undermine each other, the impact on children can be profound. Witnessing parental discord can lead to feelings of fear, abandonment, and emotional distress in children. For them, family represents security and stability, and any disruption to this dynamic can trigger anxiety.

It’s crucial for parents to recognize that children absorb stress and trauma experienced by their parents, even if it’s not overtly expressed. Children may internalize anxieties stemming from family dynamics, leading to feelings of insecurity and fear of abandonment. Even seemingly minor issues for adults can significantly impact children, causing deep-seated insecurities and anxieties.

Children often blame themselves for parental conflicts or separations, harboring feelings of guilt and abandonment. They struggle to emotionally connect with the single parent they live with while maintaining a make-believe relationship with the absent parent, further exacerbating their anxiety.

Parental disputes can shatter a child’s sense of security, eroding trust and self-confidence. Despite assumptions that children are resilient and adaptable, prolonged exposure to anxiety-inducing environments can have lasting effects on their mental well-being.

During counseling sessions, we’ve observed various symptoms of anxiety in children:

  1. Dissociation: Children may mentally disconnect from family stressors, creating imaginary worlds to cope with emotional pain. For instance, Riya, aged 6, began conversing with her doll as a means of escape from her parents’ constant arguments.
  2. Behavioral Issues: Anxiety may manifest as behavioral problems like hyperactivity, impulsiveness, and inattentiveness, as seen in Monty, aged 9, who exhibits symptoms of ADHD due to parental neglect.
  3. Depression: Chronic emotional outbursts within the family can lead to mood disorders in children, as observed in Deepa, aged 10, who was diagnosed with depression.
  4. Gastrointestinal Issues: Anxiety can manifest physically, such as in Meenu, aged 5, who experiences abdominal discomfort and constipation due to parental stress.
  5. Validation Seeking: Children may lack self-confidence and constantly seek validation from parents or caregivers, as seen in Divya, aged 11, who struggles to express herself confidently.

It’s essential for parents and educators to recognize these symptoms and provide appropriate support. Seeking professional help from psychologists for evaluation and counseling can be beneficial for both children and parents.

By acknowledging that children can be affected by parental anxieties and providing a supportive environment for open communication, parents can help alleviate children’s anxieties and promote emotional well-being. Encouraging children to express their fears and concerns openly and reassuring them of parental support can foster resilience and coping mechanisms to navigate familial stressors.

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Understanding and Supporting Children with Autism Spectrum Disorder

April 3, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

Parenting a child with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) comes with unique challenges, particularly concerning their behavior. Many parents seek guidance on understanding and managing the behavior of their children affected by ASD. With appropriate strategies and support, much of the stress and strain associated with these difficulties can be alleviated, benefiting both the family and the child.

Behavioral challenges among children with ASD encompass various aspects, including communication, social interaction, adherence to schedules, and sensory processing. It’s crucial for parents and caregivers to recognize that seemingly inappropriate behaviors are often symptomatic of the underlying difficulties these children face in their daily interactions and communication with others.

Identifying the Root Causes of Behavioral Challenges

The causes of behavioral difficulties in children with ASD typically revolve around several key factors:

  1. Communication difficulties: Children with ASD encounter challenges in both verbal and expressive language, as well as in understanding non-verbal cues. This struggle can lead to frustration for both the child and the communicator, often resulting in behaviors that may appear problematic but stem from communication barriers.
  2. Social interaction challenges: Beyond communication, individuals with ASD often struggle to comprehend social cues and navigate social situations effectively. This difficulty extends to understanding others’ perspectives and adhering to social norms, making social interactions overwhelming and potentially leading to avoidance or feelings of being harassed.
  3. Difficulty with unstructured time: Children with ASD often rely on structured schedules to navigate their day effectively. Situations lacking a clear routine can cause confusion and frustration, leading to behavioral challenges such as acting out or feeling overwhelmed.
  4. Sensory processing issues: Many individuals with ASD experience heightened or diminished sensitivity to sensory stimuli, leading to sensory overload or seeking behaviors. These challenges can manifest in various ways, such as sensitivity to touch, selective eating habits, or discomfort with loud noises.

Moreover, individuals with ASD typically struggle with adapting to change, making transitions and unexpected events particularly challenging. It’s essential for parents to be mindful of environmental or schedule changes that may trigger problem behaviors, including illness, which can exacerbate sensitivities and communication barriers.

Addressing Problem Behaviors

When dealing with problem behaviors in children with ASD, it’s crucial to approach them with understanding and empathy. Rather than reacting to the behavior itself, it’s essential to identify the underlying needs or triggers driving the behavior. Keeping a behavior diary can help parents pinpoint patterns and triggers, enabling them to develop strategies to manage or avoid these situations effectively.

Supportive therapies play a vital role in helping children with ASD cope with frustration and regulate their behavior. These therapies may include exercise, quiet time in a calming environment, and engaging in relaxing activities. Setting realistic treatment goals and allowing for gradual progress is key, as individuals with ASD may struggle with rapid changes or integration of new behaviors.

Effective Strategies for Supporting Children with ASD

To optimize support for children with ASD, parents and caregivers can implement various strategies tailored to their unique needs:

  1. Clear and concise communication: Using simple language and visual supports can aid in overcoming communication barriers and enhancing understanding.
  2. Utilize visual aids: Visual schedules and social stories can help children with ASD anticipate and navigate daily routines and social situations more effectively.
  3. Emotion identification: Helping children recognize and express their emotions through visual aids or physical cues can facilitate emotional understanding and regulation.
  4. Relaxation techniques: Incorporating relaxation activities into the child’s daily routine can help them manage stress and sensory sensitivities more effectively.
  5. Create a soothing environment: Minimizing sensory distractions in the child’s environment, such as loud noises or bright lights, can promote a sense of calm and reduce sensory overload.
  6. Positive reinforcement: Tailoring praise and rewards to suit the child’s preferences and sensitivities can encourage desired behaviors and reinforce positive interactions.

Seeking Professional Support

In cases where a child’s behavior poses a risk to themselves or others, seeking professional help from psychologists or psychiatrists is essential. Professional intervention can provide specialized assessment and guidance tailored to the child’s needs, ensuring comprehensive support and intervention.

For additional support and guidance, parents can reach out to us at Alka Mansik Pramarsh Foundation. With qualified psychologists, our center offers counseling and assistance to families navigating the challenges of raising a child with ASD. Whether through email or phone consultation, seeking support from knowledgeable professionals can empower parents to effectively support their child’s development and well-being. You can reach out to us at mansikpramarsh@gmail.com or +91-9179383554.

In conclusion, understanding and supporting children with ASD require patience, empathy, and a tailored approach to addressing their unique needs and challenges. By employing effective strategies and seeking professional support when needed, parents and caregivers can provide invaluable support to their child’s growth and development, fostering a positive and nurturing environment for their overall well-being.

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The Power of Self-Love

March 27, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

In a world where love often seems to flow outwardly towards others, we often forget the essential foundation of love: loving oneself. The adage “love yourself, because if you don’t, no one else will” rings true, yet many struggle to prioritize self-love amidst the demands of daily life and societal expectations.

The question of who the most important person in one’s life is elicits varied responses, revealing a common tendency to prioritize others over oneself. From romantic partners to children, parents, and friends, individuals often place their own needs and desires on the backburner in favor of nurturing relationships with others. This selflessness, while admirable, can lead to feelings of loneliness, emptiness, and even depression when one’s own needs go unmet.

Society has long praised the spirit of sacrifice as the ultimate virtue, but perhaps we’ve misunderstood the true essence of selflessness. While acts of giving and sacrifice are noble, they should not come at the expense of neglecting one’s own well-being.

Lord Krishna’s teachings to Arjuna emphasize the importance of acting without attachment to the outcome, but they also underscore the significance of honoring the self. Neglecting oneself in the pursuit of pleasing others ultimately diminishes one’s own capacity to give and love fully.

Self-love is not selfish; it is a prerequisite for genuine connection and fulfillment in relationships. Just as a mother must nourish herself to properly care for her child, individuals must prioritize their own physical, mental, and spiritual well-being to be of service to others. This concept may seem counterintuitive in a culture that glorifies self-sacrifice, but it is essential for creating sustainable and healthy relationships.

Cultivating self-love requires a conscious effort to prioritize one’s own needs and desires. It involves setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and acknowledging one’s worth independent of external validation. Learning to love oneself is a journey that requires patience, compassion, and vulnerability. It means embracing both our strengths and weaknesses, recognizing that imperfection is inherent to the human experience.

The path to self-love begins with self-awareness. Taking the time to reflect on our values, passions, and aspirations allows us to connect with our authentic selves. From there, we can identify the areas of our lives that need nurturing and attention. This may involve letting go of limiting beliefs, forgiving ourselves for past mistakes, and embracing our unique gifts and talents.

Self-love also involves practicing self-compassion. We are often our own harshest critics, but learning to treat ourselves with kindness and understanding is essential for fostering a positive self-image. Rather than dwelling on our flaws and shortcomings, we can choose to focus on our strengths and accomplishments. Self-compassion enables us to weather life’s challenges with resilience and grace.

Pampering oneself is not indulgent; it is an act of self-love. Whether it’s treating oneself to a relaxing spa day, indulging in a favorite hobby, or simply taking a moment to savor the present, self-care is essential for nourishing the mind, body, and soul. In a world that glorifies busyness and productivity, carving out time for self-care may feel like a luxury, but it is a necessary investment in our overall well-being.

Believing in our own worthiness is perhaps the most powerful aspect of self-love. When we recognize our inherent value as individuals, we no longer seek validation or approval from others. Instead, we derive our sense of self-worth from within, knowing that we are worthy of love and acceptance simply by virtue of being human.

In conclusion, embracing self-love is not a selfish act; it is a necessary foundation for building healthy, fulfilling relationships with others. By prioritizing our own well-being, we become better equipped to give and receive love authentically. Self-love is not a destination but a journey—one that requires patience, courage, and self-compassion. As we learn to love ourselves unconditionally, we pave the way for a life filled with joy, connection, and abundance.

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Nurturing Love in Long-Term Relationships: Balancing Romance with Reality

March 24, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

Being in love is wonderful, isn’t it? Dating, feeling those butterflies, and longing to see each other again—it’s a special time. But as relationships grow, they change. Long-term relationships are about more than just love; they’re about managing life together.

When you’re in a long-term relationship, you’re not just looking out for yourself anymore. You’re building a life with someone else. That means dealing with all sorts of things: money, jobs, family, and more. It’s not always easy.

Communication is key. It’s how you talk about your problems and work through them together. Every argument is a chance to make your relationship stronger. Instead of fighting, try to understand each other’s point of view. That’s how you grow as a couple.

One of the hardest parts is merging your lives. You’re bringing together two different worlds, with different families, careers, and goals. It takes compromise and patience.

But even with all these challenges, it’s important not to forget about romance. As time goes on, the initial excitement might fade. You might find yourself focusing more on everyday worries than on each other. That’s normal, but it’s important to make time for romance too.

Romance doesn’t have to be grand gestures. It’s the little things that matter, like holding hands or cuddling on the couch. These small moments keep the spark alive.

Understanding each other’s needs is crucial too. Life is full of ups and downs, and you need to be there for each other through it all. When you have disagreements, listen to each other and find a solution together.

It’s also important to make each other happy. In the midst of busy lives, it’s easy to forget what really matters. But love is what makes life meaningful, so cherish it.

In the end, being in a long-term relationship is about facing life together. It’s about growing and learning as a couple. Yes, there will be tough times, but love will see you through.

In conclusion, long-term relationships are a journey. They’re about more than just love; they’re about building a life together. With communication, understanding, and a little romance, you can make your relationship stronger than ever. So cherish each other and the love you share—it’s worth it.

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Understanding Depression Symptoms and Mental Health Support

March 21, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

Feeling sad, stressed, or down occasionally is normal, but prolonged periods of low mood may indicate depression. Depression symptoms include persistent sadness, loss of interest in activities, feelings of guilt or worthlessness, changes in appetite or weight, fatigue, sleep disturbances, and physical pain. If these symptoms persist for more than a week or two, it’s essential to seek mental health support.

Depression isn’t a sign of weakness or negativity; it’s a serious mental health issue that requires medical attention. It can affect various aspects of life, including careers, relationships, and daily functioning. If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or behaviors, immediate intervention is crucial.

While the exact cause of depression isn’t fully understood, factors such as altered brain chemistry, trauma, chronic illness, and hormonal changes may contribute to its development. Diagnosing depression typically involves a psychological evaluation to assess symptoms and their severity.

Treatment options for depression include therapy, medication, and social support networks. Preksha meditation, specifically the Perceptive Breathing Technique has shown promise in alleviating severe depression. This non-drug approach can complement traditional treatments and help individuals manage their symptoms effectively.

At our clinic, we offer comprehensive mental health support programs tailored to individuals struggling with depression. Our services include regular cognitive behaviour sessions, perceptive meditation sessions, counseling, and mental exercises aimed at promoting emotional well-being and recovery. If you’re ready to take the first step towards healing, contact us to learn more about our programs and how we can support you on your journey to better mental health.

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Why Couples Get Stressed and Look at Partners as -“Not So OK Spouse”- Hope It’s Not Happening to Your Family

April 12, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

Rhea (name changed )had been wondering as to where had she gone wrong in her decision to make her marriage a dream marriage that she had always dreamt about. She had wanted her marriage to be a mean to her happiness and love. She wanted to share a home full of marital bliss with her life partner Sam . Those two had always been looked upon as if they were a kind of made for each other couple during the six month long courtship. It wasn’t long since everyone at their reception ceremony had praised their complementing and completing each other .

Yet something went wrong immediately after they had returned from their honeymoon.She to utter dismay felt that she was not able to cope up with the demands being made on her by the family members of Sam. .She was feeling bad that she had not come upto the expectations of her mother in law. Her husband would often find her guilty of having upset his mother.Her mother in law would insult her ,in the kitchen and would not allow her to cook anything. if she had really been trained to be a housewife only things would have been different.She has been a professional programmer in an I.T. company and her husband who worked alongside her in the same organisation knew it very well.Then why this sudden demand of attending to household work .She would get into the bed room to discuss the post wedding trauma with her husband who often refused to discuss anything about his mother’s stand.

Jatin’s (name changed ) wife had left home to be with her mother for a week, has not returned now for many months as she decided to get out of the marriage because Jatin has not been taking her out to their regular pub joint after marriage as had been promised by him before they got married.

Ruby and Rohit (names changed ) had a long history of having been in love with each other from their childhood days and their courtship continued for more than twenty years before they decided to tie their knot. But after marriage everything turned tipsy turvy when Ruby found out that Rohit had been two timings even when he was into relationship with her .

Some of these young people may appear to be living next to us or people could be within us . But young marriages are not the only ones having jolts and jitters . Couples in their fifties and sixties years of age too have been having tough time in current situations as they either moot separation or move forward to a divorce.

Said Sudhir (name changed) “Our journey towards a blessed relationship of matrimony happened 19 years ago. We have two sons (17 and 12 ) . Recently I saw my wife talking to someone on social media Thereafter it has been a journey full of hardships and everyday fights .My marriage and its subsequent outcome had far-reaching effects on both my emotional and physical heath, as well as my self esteem and personal identity .I have decided to end this tortuous relationship.

Marriage is changing and evolving .it’s meaning in all strata of society ,be it young ,old , middle aged couples ,any income group is not the same any more .

We have had and we continue getting couples from any age group ,financial and milieu as you have read in some of the cases mentioned above .

A life long commitment to matrimonial relationship is a turning into a burden for some of the young couples .And some of the elderly couples feel it has been a difficult journey . They want to bring it to an end .But the decision to separate , from your partner with whom you have been planning to turn your dreams into a reality and walk hand in hand with each other ;to separate marital life to finally making the decision to proceed with a divorce and to coping with the stress and heartache is not so easy either ..

This is where we at Family Therapy India can help couples like above and many others who are facing turmoils into their relationships .

Our Family Therapy ,Relationship and marriage counselling sessions can help you change your life for the better.

You can learn how your personal choices are affecting your life, and that your happiness is up to you. You can’t always change your circumstances, or the situations you face in your life, but you can change how you act or react to those circumstances. It is up to you to decide what your future will look like, and to create your own happily ever after. Our family therapy ,Relationship and marriage counselling can help you find yourself, and let go of the feelings of anger, frustration, betrayal, and despair that are holding you back. It can teach you how to set goals and move toward a positive and successful future within your marriage, You can learn how to make permanent, lasting changes that benefit both of you and of course other members of your family.

Our Emotions Focussed Therapy and Counselling can help you regulate your emotions and learn the process of the best decision making on personal, financial, and practical aspects of your life that will develop better understanding for you and your partner to reaffirm your relationship.

We offer Family therapy , relationship and marriage Counselling sessions for families ,men, women and couples who are living with children, recently married, thinking of separation, getting a divorce, or experiencing relationship difficulties .We strongly believe in helping all those couples who are facing difficulties within their relationship at any age to understand each other’s mental and emotional state . We help them to set their communication better and overcome obstacles that are preventing them from achieving the happiness they deserve.

Get in touch with us today or write to us mansikpramarsh@gmail.com

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EYE MOVEMENT DESENSITIZATION AND REPROCESSING TO TREAT MENTAL HEALTH DISORDERS

January 21, 2024 by Ramneek Kapoor

WHAT IS EYE MOVEMENT DESENSITIZATION AND REPROCESSING (EDMR)?

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is a psychotherapy that enables people to heal from the symptoms and emotional distress that are the result of disturbing life experiences.

Francine Shapiro developed EMDR in 1987, she based EMDR on the notion that emotional distress can be processed when asleep during the rapid eye movement (REM). Phase.

She utilised this natural process in order to successfully treat Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Since then, EMDR has been used to effectively treat a wide range of mental health problems.

Repeated studies show that by using EMDR therapy people can experience the benefits of psychotherapy that once took years to make a difference.

It is widely assumed that severe emotional pain requires a long time to heal. EMDR therapy shows that the mind can in fact heal from psychological trauma much as the body recovers from physical trauma.

WHAT IS AN EMDR SESSION LIKE?

After a thorough assessment, you will be asked specific questions about a particular disturbing memory.

Eye movements, similar to those during REM sleep, will be recreated simply by asking you to watch the therapist’s finger moving backwards and forwards across your visual field.

Sometimes, a bar of moving lights or headphones is used instead.

The eye movements will last for a short while and then stop.

You will then be asked to report back on the experiences you have had during each of these sets of eye movements.

Experiences during a session may include changes in thoughts, images and feelings.

With repeated sets of eye movements, the memory tends to change in such a way that it loses its painful intensity and simply becomes a neutral memory of an event in the past.

Other associated memories may also heal at the same time.

This linking of related memories can lead to a dramatic and rapid improvement in many aspects of your life.

WHAT CAN EMDR BE USED FOR?

In addition to its use for the treatment of Post-traumatic Stress Disorder, EMDR has been successfully used to treat:

  • anxiety and panic attacks
  • depression
  • stress
  • phobias
  • sleep problems
  • complicated grief
  • addictions

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Mental health of older adults members is as important as your own .

August 25, 2023 by Ramneek Kapoor

As Families go distant and international what happens to elderly ,needs a special look.

Elderly couple keeping company to each other

Mr Subhash an octogenarian and his wife Sita a graceful old lady of 76 years have been roughing it out all alone for past twenty years or so . Their two sons moved out of the country in their career pursuits and have since settled abroad. A once in three years trip from either of their sons hardly provide the old couple a feeling of being part of the larger family .Yet they carry on taking care of each other . Mr Subhash suffers from sleep disorders , recurrent depression and anxiety. Sita fights her own battle with her old age issues yet bravely accompanying her husband to his sessions with the psychologist.

A lonely old man

Similarly Mr Naweja a businessman finds it tough to carry on further as his son and daughter have moved out of home to metro cities to carve out their own career paths .Mr Naweja in his mid seventies suffers from and fights with many physical and mental ailments as he keeps his dates with doctors and the psychologist. He had lost his wife five years ago .A few months in the metropolis where his son works , were spent sitting alone at home but he eventually decided to come back and join business at his old place.

Mrs Khedekar lost her husband about twenty years ago when she was in her early forties .She didn’t give up then as her two sons were quite young and needed to finish their education.Her elder son moved abroad to meet his own career dreams and the younger one to another city for his pursuit of happiness.Years of loneliness has resulted into her developing psychosis ,schizophrenia and a host of other diseases.Though under the professional care of a trained nurse life is still very lonely for her resulting into periodic reversals of her treatment.

An elderly woman leading life alone

In recent times many of the older adults are leading their life all alone without the love and support of their near and dear ones as their wards necessarily have moved out on account of their careers to metropolitans , or abroad . In such a situation it is obvious that besides the emotional stress elders also have to take the stress of taking care of their mental and physical health and also to ensure a little bit of social health so that they don’t get loners and restricted to within .

In many cases it has been observed that the new couples prefer a life away from their parents in order to understand and know each other better and develop intimacy . Such a step is always good provided the periodic and regular touch with elders is maintained .

Let’s browse a few facts :

  • Globally, the population is ageing rapidly. Between 2015 and 2050, the proportion of the world’s population over 60 years will nearly double, from 12% to 22%.In India there are currently 138 millions elderly persons comprising of 67 million elderly males and 71 million elderly females .
  • Mental and neurological disorders among older adults account for 6.6% of the total disability (DALYs) for this age group.
  • Approximately 15% of adults aged 60 and over suffer from a mental disorder.
  • Maintenance of brain health is as important as the physical health of the elders .
  • While most have good physical health, many older adults are at risk of developing psychological ,mental disorders, neurological disorders and brain health problems.
  • They in their loneliness may develop substance use problems as well as other health conditions such as diabetes, hearing loss, and osteoarthritis.
  • As people age, they are more likely to experience several co morbid physical,mental and neurological conditions at the same time causing much distress to the elderly.

Risk factors for mental health problems among older adults

There may be multiple risk factors for mental health problems at any point in life. Older people may experience life stressors common to all people, but also stressors that are more common in later life, like a significant ongoing loss in capacities and a decline in functional ability. For example, older adults may experience reduced mobility, chronic pain, frailty or other health problems, for which they require some form of long-term care. In addition, older people are more likely to experience events such as bereavement, or a drop in socioeconomic status with retirement. All of these stressors coupled with the prospects of staying alone without the company of their near and dear ones can result in isolation, loneliness or psychological distress in older people, for which they may require long-term care.

Mental health has an impact on physical health and vice versa. For example, older adults with physical health conditions such as heart disease have higher rates of depression than those who are healthy. Additionally, untreated depression in an older person with heart disease can negatively affect its outcome.

An elderly couple

Older adults are also vulnerable to elder abuse – including physical, verbal, psychological, financial and social abuse ; abandonment; neglect; and serious losses of dignity and respect. Current evidence suggests that 1 in 6 older people experience elder abuse. Elder abuse can lead not only to physical injuries, but also to serious, sometimes long-lasting psychological consequences, including depression and anxiety.

What is the way out for us ? Is a question often asked by the family members ,when they bring their parents and other elders for a counselling session or for a family therapy interaction with the author .

Tanvi (name changed ) had come to the clinic along with her mother in law . Her mother in law stays alone in the city just refuses to leave her familiar home and move with her son abroad.The septuagenarian suffers from depression,anxiety , sleep issues .Tanvi had to eventually tell this psychologist,”I am leaving her to your care .You act as a local guardian for her and keep us informed of her welfare”.

Though Tanvi could say that but several others of such elderly and their wards are left at their wits end ,not knowing whether to abandon their dream careers and come back ,force the elderly to accompany them or to leave their senior members of their family at the hands of domestic workers and professional agencies .

The struggle continues .

Family is always happy when the elders are happy and healthy.

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