Members of families in their ignorance or sometimes deliberately hurt each other to cause an unending mental emotional pain. Although a good family is meant to help individual members develop themselves to their full potential but chains of miscommunications, uncalled for egos, familial fights, discords and long-drawn-out misunderstandings result into a dysfunctional family hampering not only relationships but also a complete non achievement of personal career goals by individuals.
Kritika and Vijay (names changed) have been victims of two such grossly dysfunctional families themselves in their young age prior to their marriage and have till date (even after a decade of their having been married) not been able to overcome traumas of their young days in their parental homes. Resultantly now their children suffer from traumas of dis -functioning of their own families.
Little girl doesn't want to hear arguing of parentsDr Kritika (name changed) and her two siblings have been witnessing painful fights of their parents all through their life where a triangular drama would take place every day and night with sibling shifting allegiances and taking sides sometimes with their father, another time with mother or being at war with each other. These fights still continue even though all siblings have chosen their own paths in life, they continue abhorring each other. Kritika’ s all efforts to bring her parents and siblings together again is not being accepted by others of family resultantly their deadlock remains.
Such painful family events and interactions leave intense hurts, personality issues, traumas and social adjustment issues all through life. Sejal, Sonia, Kamolika, Anand, Sumit (fictitious names ) and many others such people have been suffering PTSD, Anxieties ,Mistrusts ,phobias ,adjustment issues after they lived through such most painful family dramas and now they suffer alongside their children and spouses too because of the torments of the past .
The indelible scars of family fights destabilise the psyches of family members, have impacted their relationships, job performance and emotional stability all through the life. We have been helping many of such families deal with such dis functioning, Traumatic experiences childhood scars, depression anxiety and stresses to enable them understand what emotions prevailed when the dis functioning occurred, and how these family members could not deal with their as well as their parents’ partners, children and their siblings’ similar experiences —in which their entire family had suffered and many of them still suffer.
Understanding Triangulation of the dis functioning.
The functioning of any family gets disturbed when the normal day to day interaction with each other turns into accusations of not fulfilling expectations. Or when communication is not understood in the right perceptive or when the words used for emotions do not convey the spirit behind but the use of those words and dialogues or when patience is short lived and angers flare up.
In any such situation, the battle field turns into the members un knowingly playing the roles of perpetrators, victims or the negotiators who often act as mediators or pacifiers. But sometimes they also end up taking sides with either one. We believe every household or a family can get into such a situation one time or the other. However, if such a situation continues or comes up recurrently is the cause for alarm. Because if not resolved at the appropriate time it can turn onto a chronic dis functioning of the family.
A new understanding and perception of dealing with those situations have helped these families deal with and each individual member transformed into a stable, loving, mature, and dependable person, attaining their best personal success after they have come over to Family Therapy India.
If your family is one such family suffering from misfunctioning and traumas of the past . It is time now to help your family overcome such disputes, ego bruises, mistrusts and angers of the past. Take control of your life and feelings, and help others understand the need for curing their feelings. Know that we can help you bring about a positive change in your filial relationships. With commitment and time and our expert counseling sessions of family therapy, healing begins steadily and gradually until the family adopts the new normal relationships.
Poonam and her husband Sangit had a wonderful marriage going for the first year of their marriage.Everything seemed to have been set specially to bring the joy and comfortable living for them in their life, but things took an adverse turn when Poonam had conceived her first baby. Her pregnancy ( an unplanned one ) had happened and Sangit didn’t know how to handle this. Poonam’s early morning sickness was too much for him to take .He felt that he had been dealt a wrong hand in the 
Dolly had echoed similar words of dissatisfaction in her marriage to this therapist as she expressed her annoyance on her husband for spending most of his days for office travel unnecessary . She told the therapist, ” even on the days he is in town he would hardly give time to me and children. Every evening my husband spends his time with his friends partying in the club or a bar”.
Harish a businessman speaks same thoughts when he says, ” my wife throws one kitty party every week compulsorily and the days she does not throw a party herself, it would be any of her friends inviting her over. We hardly see each other at home. We have become strangers staying under the same roof”.
Family is Everything .
Alka Mansik Pramarsh Foundation Clinical Psychologists-Family therapists Indore 0731-4263087,9179383554 