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Archive for the ‘daily writings and musings of the psychologist’ Category

we have often  found  that the   most useful and effective  treatment for O.C.D  is  cognitive-behavioral therapy. Antidepressants may   sometimes be used by some in addition to the   cognitive   behavioral therapy, but  medication alone    in the long run has proved counter effective on many occasions  and  has done more damage .  The benefit   to the counselled can occur on a healthy combination of meditation and  of  the  behavioral  counselling.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy for obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD )

Behavioral  therapy for obsessive-compulsive disorder works on the strength of  two components:

  1. Exposure and response prevention: repeatedly exposing the obsessed to the source of obsession . The person may be counseled  to refrain from the compulsive behavior that he or she would  usually perform to reduce the  anxiety. For example to  a compulsive hand washer, he or she should be advised  to touch the door handle in a public restroom . the counseled should be  then be prevented from washing the hands . As the individual deals impatiently  with his or her  anxiety, the urge to wash may diminish with the passing of time. it is possible that it may gradually begin to go away on its own.
  2. Cognitive therapy focuses on the negative and fearful  thoughts and more than necessary  sense of responsibility counselled  may feel  . A big part of cognitive therapy for OCD is teaching the counseled  , positive , effective and  healthy way of accepting obsessive thoughts and responding to them  positively  without resorting to compulsive behavior.

Four Steps for Conquering Obsessive Thoughts and Compulsive Urges

Psychiatrist Jeffrey Schwartz, author of Brain Lock: Free Yourself from Obsessive-Compulsive Behavior, has advanced the following four steps for dealing with OCD:

  • RELABEL –  the person may be trained to believe that the ritual of obsessive behavior is a weakness and he or she has the strength to conquer it. the counselled may be trained to  to say, “I don’t think or feel that my hands are dirty. my hands are clean , I do not need to wash them .” Or, “I don’t feel that I have the need to wash my hands. they are fine.
  • REATTRIBUTE – Realize that the intensity and intrusiveness of the thought or urge is caused by OCD; it is probably related to a biochemical imbalance in the brain. Tell yourself, “It’s not me—it’s my OCD,” to remind you that OCD thoughts and urges are not meaningful, but are false messages from the brain.
  • REFOCUS – Work around the OCD thoughts by focusing your attention on something else, at least for a few minutes. Do another behavior. Say to you, “I’m experiencing a symptom of OCD. I need to do another behavior.”
  • REVALUE – Do not take the OCD thought at face value. It is not significant in itself. Tell yourself, “That’s just my stupid obsession. It has no meaning. That’s just my brain. There’s no need to pay attention to it.” Remember: You can’t make the thought go away, but neither do you need to pay attention to it. You can learn to go on to the next behavior.
  • How can we help you: Mansik Pramarsh program for managing OCD is supported to help  overcome the symptoms associated with OCD by our regular daily counseling sessions/mental exercises/ preksha meditation and Kayotsarg. Hundreds have benefited, it is your /your child’s turn now.  Call 09179383554 or email: mansikpramarsh@gmail.com.

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 Obsessions occur to the suffering individual involuntary. Such obsessions are irrepressible belief, imagery, or impulsive imaginations that come to the mind repeatedly. The individual   is unable to avoid such thoughts even though he or she does not want to have such thoughts .it is not possible for him or her to obliterate such thoughts. Obsessive thoughts   can cause havoc in the individual’s    day to day routine works and the peaceful and normal living of the individual becomes    difficult.

Compulsions on the other hand are such performed behaviors or rituals that he or she will be compelled to act out in order to make sure the obsessions are carried out and the peace of mind can be attained .  For example, if someone is afraid of catching some kind of disease and infection, he or she might develop obsession for cleaning everything .the person will be afraid of touching anything with bare hands. The person ends up repeatedly washing and cleaning hands.  The psychological counseling can help the obsessed persons over a longer period but the   counselee generally does not sustain long and repeated sessions. He or she drops out of the sessions mid way and the obsessive thoughts can be back again in a much stronger way,  causing anxiety and the  compulsive acts become more compulsive, demanding and unavoidable .

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 Obsessions take place involuntary. These are apparently uncontrollable thoughts, images, or impulses that take place over and over again in the mind of the person having such obsessions. The individual does not want to have such thoughts but he or she can’t stop them. Unfortunately, these obsessive thoughts cause disturbance and distraction from the normal routine works and the daily living of the individual.

Compulsions are such repeatedly performed behaviors or rituals that he or she feels compelled to act out.  Such compulsions are performed in an attempt to take care of the obsessive thoughts and the performer will take to such tasks because he or she wants such obsessions to  go away. For example, if someone is afraid of contamination and infection, he or she might develop obsession for cleaning everything and or not touching anything with bare hands and or may act out repeatedly washing and cleaning hands.  The counseling and the guidance may provide temporary relief but it never lasts. The obsessive thoughts may come back stronger. Such compulsive behaviors end up causing anxiety themselves as the compulsive acts become more compulsive, demanding and time-consuming.

People afflicted with   obsessive-compulsive disorder may  fall into one of the following categories:

  •   Washers : they are afraid of contamination. They usually have cleaning or  hand-washing compulsions.
  • Checkers : they repeatedly check things (oven turned off, door locked, etc.) that they associate mentally  with  some kind of harm or danger to them or to their dearones .
  • Doubters and sinners : their sense of perfection  make them  scared of many things. They believe and are afraid   that if everything isn’t perfect ,something terrible will happen or they will be punished.
  • Counters and arrangers. They  are obsessed with, arrangement, perfect  order and symmetry. They become  superstitious about  numbers, colors,  arrangements, objects etc. .
  • Hoarders   : they fear that something bad will happen if they throw or waste  anything away. They feel compelled to  hoard things that they don’t need or  do not use.

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“She sleeps early  in the evening and gets up around midnight  . She is compulsively obsessed with the thought of cleaning her entire house every night . She will wake up her kids and husband , disturb  them    from their sound sleep and carry out with her task of washing and sleeping irrespective of the fact that her  act causes distract and distraught to her family members”.

“This man is always anxious that   he has not been able to  achieve any thing in  his life and hence the very thought disturbs him leading him to weeping anxiety about himself. He often gets up in the middle of the night thinking some thing will happen to his family and hence  double checks that every thing  is in order”  .

” She knows that she is in love with him but she is obsessed with the thought that  he does not match up to  her good looks and family standards , hence she loses her   peace of mind and gets up  in the middle of-the night worrying  about the opinion of family and friends”.

Every individual has a sense of anxiety and mistrust inbuilt within the personality. It is many a times noticed that people  occasionally have to go back and double-check that  the gas stove has been put off, car doors have been locked , a tap has been closed or a  fan has been switched off .  There is nothing to worry if it is done as a gesture of ensuring safety.   But for    some of those   people who suffer from obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), the degree of their obsessive feelings and repetitive compulsive behavior become very dominating and extreme. Their thoughts and the desire to perform same tasks repeatedly and obsessively interfere with their daily routine making it difficult to lead a normal family life.

The person, who suffers from the obsessive-compulsive disorder, may feel isolated, helpless, anxious and irritated and feel compelled to perform the same rituals, tasks and actions over and over again. His or her  anxiety may lead to many kinds of personality disorders, depression and a sense of inadequacy. Such obsessive disorder may need psychological, psychiatric and clinical help depending upon the intensity of OCD.   The first help is always obtained by understanding as to what  is obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)?

 Understanding Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:  (OCD) is a form of an anxiety disorder. It gets expressed in individual sufferers   by way of uncontrollable, unwanted thoughts appearing in their minds repetitively and accompanied by their ritualized behaviors; the individual may feel compelled to perform. The person having OCD, may recognize the fact his or her obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors are absurd. But even so, the sufferer is unable to resist them and break free.

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) becomes the cause of the brain getting engaged time and again on a particular thought or urge. For example, the person may  wash hands  repeatedly  until the hands get hurt , or may go back to car garage time and again to check that the car doors have been locked , may bite the nails so much that the fingers turn red and bloodied , may  rub hands in despair and even may  sweep floors , wash the dirt of the furniture repeatedly.

How to spot OCD

People with OCD normally have unreasonable fears (called obsessions) which they try to reduce by performing certain behaviours (called compulsions).

OCD is thought to affect around 2.3% of people at some point in their lives.

Most people develop symptoms before they are twenty-years-old.

Perhaps the most familiar example is people repeatedly washing their hands (a compulsion) to avoid getting a disease (an obsession).

That said, though, some people are considered to have OCD despite ‘only’ having obsessions or ‘only’ having compulsions.

Around 70% have both obsessions and compulsions, 20% just obsessions and 10% compulsions alone.

As with most psychological problems, OCD involves normal fears which are taken to extreme.

It’s perfectly normal to be worried about disease, but extremely inconvenient to wash your hands 300 times a day.

Both obsessions and compulsions are a matter of degree.

Once it’s causing problems in everyday life, it needs addressing.

Here are some common obsession:

  1. Need for orderliness and symmetry.
  2. Fear of dirt or contamination by germs.
  3. Excessive doubt.
  4. Fear of sinful or evil thoughts.
  5. Fear of making a mistake.
  6. Fear of harming another person.
  7. Thinking about acting inappropriately or shouting obscenities.

Here are some typical compulsions:

  1. Getting mentally ‘stuck’ on certain images or thoughts that won’t go away.
  2. Repeated hand-washing, showering or bathing.
  3. Repeating particular words or phrases.
  4. Always arranging things in a certain way.
  5. Constant counting during routine tasks, whether mentally or out loud.
  6. Performing tasks a certain number of times.
  7. Always checking things like locks or ovens.
  8. Collecting or hoarding things with no value.

Most people are fully aware that their thoughts and/or behaviours are unreasonable, some are not.

Stress normally makes the symptoms of OCD worse.

Around one-third of people with OCD also make repeated sudden movements or sounds.

These are called ‘tics’.

It’s not known exactly what causes OCD, but it’s likely a combination of genetic and environmental factors.

In other words: it runs in the family and it’s likely brought on by stress.

Typically, people are treated with medication and cognitive-behavioural therapy.

There’s some question over whether medication really helps much.

Psychological therapies, though, are usually helpful.

Therapy often involves learning to tolerate anxiety without performing the ritualised behaviour.

While most people are not cured, the majority can learn to manage the symptoms and live a normal life.

After treatment, most people see a substantial reduction in their symptoms.

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Every couple who decides to tie the marital knot should understand and be aware of that it is ultimately the available of sufficient regular income for running the life that will keep the smile on the lips and love in the heart going for each other. They must realize that it is the satisfactory flow of money that will keep the kitchen fires burning and make the marriage enjoyable and workable for the family. Most of the times, it is the lack of adequate money that becomes the cause of irritation, intolerance for each other and subsequent fights between couples. Couples in their romanticism may not give that kind of importance to money and plunge headlong into an early marriage /live in relationship. Such issues need to be worked out in advance by both the partners immediately after they decide to live together on long term basis as partners be it within the wedlock or outside the wedlock. The couples need to sit down and discuss the money that will be available for immediate daily living, the long time prospects when offspring is planned and decide as to who is going to contribute in what way to the family money kitty. They must be expressive to each other on their thoughts and attitude on money. Such planning and understanding will keep the tempers from flaring up later on in life and threaten the very institute of marriage. Romantic thoughts, poetry, not willing to touch the dreary topics of money management styles may want to consider having a “specific date to discuss marital fund” to find out the ways and means to find the cash and for making each future day a very healthy and beautiful day of marital life Couples who both work and earn and who plan to get married should mutually decide whether they should operate common fund, separate contributions, joint accounts, separate accounts or both.

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This may not seem very important issue as majority of the couples in India belong to almost similar /same religion but personal habits of following or not adhering to religious rituals can cause tensions and stresses in marital life. , again with many mixed marriages being on the rise , many couples in their infatuation for each other overlook something that may create rifts and problems in the relationship , once the initial euphoria of the infatuation settles down. Any of the partners can have strong religious convictions or the pressures from the family and society can make them oppose each other. Every couple should look for a freedom to maintain their personal beliefs. But being humans we do get carried away on occasions and as such the couple needs to look for a counseling support system to handle such delicate matters. Though some of the common systems as mentioned below should help • Refraining from performing religious activities, but it is in human nature to not to become an atheist. • Converting one partner to the other’s religion but then modern individualism may come in the way, as it amounts to surrendering personal freedom. • Compromise and finding a middle path of accepting a faith that meets both the rituals and beliefs • emerging of the common religion, where each accepts and supports the others faith and beliefs without converting • Each person maintaining the original religious conviction separately and allowing full freedom to the other .

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working-under-pressure

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An open communication definitely will help the couple resolve their differences. They can do so by sitting in an amicable atmosphere of love and regard for each other’s opinion and   view point.   Many issues can be settled in life by having a long talk.  Some other issues can be settled and resolved by professional counseling. It may so happen some times that the couple simply isn’t compatible cerebrally and physically to be together.  But that does not mean that the strangers cannot become the best of friends. Efforts made in the right direction can bring the poles apart personalities to develop tolerance and acceptance of each other which may eventually ignite the sparks of love and affection too.

A strained relationship can be developed due to many smaller yet important issues which could have been better resolved as soon as these differences had cropped up.  The differences could also have been arisen as a  result of much deeper  issues. Certain problems seem to be common among many couples, so those areas are good places to start when trying to work on a lifelong marital relationship. A good beginning can be made  by the young couple by   seeking premarital counseling to help them with their relationship support material and tips that can help the couple  build a solid foundation for a happy married life.

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It is wonderful feeling to be in love and date each other. While dating prior to the commitment made to each other for a long term relationship, the couples meet for awhile and then pine for each other till they meet at the next date. Everything is seen by them from behind the rosy shades of love and affection for each other. The emotions of possessiveness and yearning do not bring in the mundane communication of a daily grinds of life. But being in a long-term relationship isn’t merely pining for the lover’s physical intimacy alone. Being in long term relationships will involve managing and taking care of many other lives in addition to the lives of the lovers. And it is not an easy task. . Both people need to accommodate themselves to new family atmosphere and new relationships in their lives. Gradually they will have to raise their own families to make their family a complete unit. They need to then communicate over many other issues in addition to the romance and love in marriage. Their issues that gain priority over love may pertain to jobs and careers, money and household expense, household work and taking care of the babies, social, cultural and religious affairs, parenting and in many cases taking care of the aged and old in the families. As a couple begins their journey into the long-term relationship of wedded bliss, their love for each other many a times may take a back seat and the love gets reduced to a few stolen kisses and quickies here and there. The couple forgets about nurturing and keeping the flame of love and desire for each other alive. Soon the infatuation of physical hunger wears off and then the focus shifts from the affection to the problems. The stark realities of need for more money, career priorities and of culture, of religion, and of family may cause concerns and small squabbles. Before these squabbles get blown into major issues and a beautiful relationship begins to disintegrate. The couple needs to understand that every relationship is important in life and more so with the one with whom you have to spend your life time. Needless to say, that every difference and misunderstanding should be treated as worth working for and saving, once the infatuation begins to fade. Communication is the only tool and doorway to establish a better understanding; essentially the couple, need to take    up all those problems that are causing strangled relationship .

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 Counseling should obviously be sought when the individual have selected a companion and the decisions to get married by both the individuals have been finalized, so that the benefits can be accrued by both the partners in their future married life.   The psychologists recommend seeking counseling:

  • When both the partners are very young and have never been married. ( of course both have   to take decision to get  married only at the legal marriage age allowed by the law of the land )
  • When the commitment for marriage cannot be taken with an open mind and the decision leads to fears and phobia in the individual’s mind.
  •  When the decision involves many issues related to   religion, culture, family ,  economic, social background, income, , parenting, household responsibility, work, job, career ambitions,  physical intimacy, sex, companionship, privacy, loss of independence etc.
  • When any of the near relatives, parents, siblings, have been through a bad marriage in the family.
  • When either or both partners have had a failed marriage before and have been through a trauma of legal divorce.
  • When the family pressures conflict with personal reasons and attitude.
  •   When the individual have been a victim of childhood abuse or domestic violence.
  • When individual has other reasons that could create conflicting situations with either of the spouse or other near and dear ones.

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