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Matters of Mind and Heart -Reaching Emotional Stability and Life Balance

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 19, 2026| Leave a Comment »

Mind and heart

Much has been written by thinkers, philosophers, scientists, sages and preachers on the subject of mind and heart. There has been  endless research on the issue of restless mind and spirit of human beings, yet the peace still eludes many of us. The world still suffers from many diseases of the mind and heart. Words like depression, anxiety, stress and phobic disorder, mental disorder, behavioral disorder are being used like the common place flu and colds happening to ordinary people. The medical world abounds by all kinds of medicines and treatments, offering little respite to those who suffer. People  continue to suffer .Their restless minds and souls are constantly being tormented.

Through the columns of these pages we will try to understand how do we establish  better understanding  of these matters of mind and heart to reach emotional stability in our lives and keep our lives balanced.

We humans are connected with the organic world with the most developed brain and thinking powers. In the organic world three kinds of living beings exist i.e., those that have the instinctual survival bereft of any emotions, those that survive only on the basis of their physical strength and display only momentary emotional awareness .

Humans have been bestowed with the powers that can generate emotions in our system involuntarily and activate our thinking system whether we like it or not.  

We also have a fully developed mental perception, which can take cognizance of the matter and connect it to the events and consequences.

We have a fully developed memory. We think, we imagine, we connect and we activate. Much as man would like to become thoughtless at times, sleep without any connection to the real world, the brain continues working either voluntarily but mostly involuntarily.

The involuntary emotional system activates our mind all the time. It forces the mind to imagine, to create and to dream. The dreams motivate us to plan which are executed by us to realize all those that we dreamt of. But in the law of our land where we have the thought, the power to dream and the power to reflect, we do have the situations that cause conflict and pain. For wherever there is a mind, the thought, the power to reflect, the analytical skill, there we have the conflict, the contradiction. No mental activity can ever be without the contradictory and opposite situation.

Wherever we have the mind, we have the pain and we have the misery.

Man however does not want to suffer. He wants to always be in comfort, in happiness and in the enjoyment of a happy life. This is a natural phenomenon .All living beings look for a life full of comforts. The inanimate only do not know the difference between   the comfort and discomfort.

The living beings who do not have a mind suffer only for a short while. Their sense of discomfort is only short lived,  is unexpressed on account of lack of emotions . They do not consign their discomfort to their   memory bank. Nor do they draw upon their memory bank to reflect and compare their current and past discomfort. But man being a thinking organic sensitive emotional mind feels, expresses, analyses ,compares  and consigns  all comforts and discomforts to his   memory bank, thus in a way being always under the load of misery .

Can the mind be free from worries and miseries? 

We are all part of the larger organic world in which we are all living beings like millions of other kinds of living being inhabiting the solar system. Our world in fact as compared to the world of other living beings of the universe is too small. We are very miniscule in numbers, barely a few trillions all over the globe.

The other planets must be peopled with many more living beings which the science is continuously researching into. Whether those living beings too have similar emotions, thoughts, mind and heart developed like us, only the research will find out.

But humans of our dear earth are endowed with a developed mental faculty. we all think .Thinking ,reflecting is an activity of the mind. We remember, we consign our thoughts to memory bank. We imagine. We create thoughts. Creation of thoughts and imagination is a mental exercise. We plan larger things for our life by the strength of our imagination .We dream of things that are larger than our life. We aspire for making these dreams come true. we do realize some of these dreams, imagination, and aspirations yet many other remain out of reach .

In order to understand the malady that has befallen the modern mind we will have to know the functioning of the mind in the modern age .the modern times are the reflectors of the cerebral psychological problems. Every individual is  involved fully into the mental day to day stresses of life.

The involvement of the human mind into the cerebral problems becomes the major detriment to the peace and happiness of the human intellect.  Every human being wants to become free of the mental stress that he is suffering from.  We need to understand as to what mind is, in order to get liberated from the stresses and problems of the mind.

Without really looking into the functioning of the mind it is simply irrelevant to solve the problems that exist in our psyche today.

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What Is Schizophrenia?

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 6, 2026| Leave a Comment »

What Is Schizophrenia?
Schizophrenia is a chronic, disabling brain disorder that affects about 1% of Americans. It may cause people to hear voices, see imaginary sights, or believe other people are controlling their thoughts. These sensations can be frightening and often lead to erratic behavior. There is no cure, but treatment can usually control the most serious symptoms.
Schizophrenia Symptoms

Symptoms of schizophrenia may include
• Delusions — wildly false beliefs
• Paranoia — the fear others are plotting against you
• Hallucinations — hearing voices or imagining things that do not exist
Some symptoms, such as lack of enjoyment in everyday life and withdrawal from social activities, may mimic depression.
How Schizophrenia Affects Thoughts

People with schizophrenia often have abnormal ways of thinking. They may have trouble organizing their thoughts or making logical connections. They may feel like the mind is racing from one unrelated thought to another. Sometimes they experience “thought blocking,” a feeling that thoughts are removed from their head. Despite popular belief, schizophrenia is not dissociative identity disorder (multiple personality disorder.
How Schizophrenia Affects Behavior

Schizophrenia causes a wide range of behaviors. People may speak incoherently or even make up words. They may act agitated or appear stone-faced. Many people have trouble maintaining basic hygiene or orderly homes. Schizophrenia can also cause repetitive behaviors, such as pacing. In contrast to common stereotypes, the risk of violence against others is small.
Who Gets Schizophrenia?

Schizophrenia affects men and women at the same rate, and occurs almost equally in all ethnic groups around the world. Symptoms usually begin between ages 16 and 30. The onset tends to be earlier in men than in women. Schizophrenia rarely begins during childhood or after age 45. People with schizophrenia in their family may have a higher risk for the illness.
What Causes Schizophrenia?

The exact cause is not known, but scientists suspect genes and environment both play a role. Inside the brain, levels of the chemical messengers’ dopamine and glutamate may be out of balance. And brain structures may be abnormal, too. For example, brain scans of identical twins show that the fluid-filled “ventricles” can be larger in a twin with schizophrenia, compared with a twin who does not have the illness. Activity levels can also be higher or lower than normal in some areas of the schizophrenic brain.
Diagnosing Schizophrenia

There are no lab tests to detect schizophrenia, so a diagnosis is usually based on history and symptoms. Tests may be ordered to rule out other medical causes of symptoms. In teenagers, a combination of family history and certain behaviors can help predict the onset of schizophrenia. These behaviors include withdrawing from social groups and expressing unusual suspicions.
Medicine for Schizophrenia

Prescription drugs can reduce symptoms such as abnormal thinking, hallucinations, and delusions. It’s thought they work by regulating certain brain chemicals and receptors that influence thinking, perception, and behavior. Some people have troubling side effects, including tremors and weight gain. Schizophrenia drugs can also interact with other medications or supplements. In most cases, long-term medication is essential to managing schizophrenia.

Preksha Meditation

The symptoms associated with schizophrenia can be  reduced and behaviors and thoughts can be brought back to normal  by our regular daily counseling sessions/mental exercises/ preksha meditation and Kayotsarg
Psychosocial Therapies

Counseling can help people cope with their problem behaviors and thoughts, and improve how they relate to others. In cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), people learn to test the reality of their thoughts and better manage symptoms. Other forms of therapy aim to improve self-care, communication, and relationship skills. These strategies are are adopted in addition to medication, to help people  manage everyday challenges.
Rehabilitation

Rehabilitation may include job training, money management counseling, and guidance in using public transportation or shopping for groceries. The goal is to help people with schizophrenia stay employed and maintain as much independence as possible. Rehab programs are particularly effective when combined with psychotherapy.
Relapse Prevention

People with schizophrenia sometimes quit their medications because of side effects or a poor understanding of their illness. They may stop attending counselling / preksha meditation sessions  before the actual benefits occur to them. This raises the risk of serious symptoms returning and triggering a full psychotic episode. Regular psycho social therapy can help people stay on medication/CBT/ Preksha Meditation  and avoid a relapse or the need for hospitalization.
Schizophrenia and Relationships
Relationships can be a challenge for people with schizophrenia. Their unusual thoughts and behaviors may alienate friends, co-workers, and family members. Sticking to a treatment plan can reduce social isolation. One form of therapy focuses on forming and nurturing interpersonal relationships. In addition, support groups or family therapy can help loved ones better understand the illness.
Schizophrenia and Substance Abuse

People with schizophrenia are much more likely than the general population to abuse drugs or alcohol. Some drugs, including marijuana and cocaine, can make symptoms worse. Drug abuse can also interfere with treatments for schizophrenia. Patients with a drug problem may benefit from substance abuse programs specifically designed for people with schizophrenia.
Schizophrenia and Pregnancy

Most drugs used to treat schizophrenia have no known risk for increasing the risk of birth defects, but decisions about medication treatment for schizophrenia during pregnancy should be discussed with your doctor.
Tips for Family Members

Schizophrenia can be confused with other mental health disorders so a careful evaluation is key. It can also be difficult to convince someone with schizophrenia to get help. Treatment often begins when a psychotic episode results in a hospital stay. Once the person is stabilized, family members can help prevent a relapse by:
• Encouraging the person to stay on meditation/counselling /medication.
How can we help you: Mansik Pramarsh program for managing schizophrenia disorder is supported to help children and adults to overcome the symptoms associated with schizophrenia by our regular daily counseling sessions/mental exercises/ preksha meditation and Kayotsarg. Hundreds have benefited, it is your /your child’s turn now. Call 09179383554 or email: mansikpramarsh@gmail.com.

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Why Don’t My Kids Listen To Me and Always Oppose and Defy Me ?

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 19, 2026| Leave a Comment »

Joseph a twelve years old adolescent didn’t quite understand what was happening to him .Every time he would want to say something to his parents or even to the teacher in the school it would be taken as an upfront defiance .His father would rebuke him and mother would end up in tears resting the blame on Joseph .Joseph had been identified as the trouble maker in school too .

Jatin a 13 years old lad had been singled out by his class teacher for creating trouble for others in class and he had been set up a bench to sit away from others in the class room ,causing so much embarrassment to him.

He would be rebuked each time others would make a noise in the class .The teacher would simply name him out first and would not even make amends when she found it was some other student who led the riot .

Swara’s family didn’t quite understand why she had started shouting back at her parents and teachers of late .They looked at it as her sulking behaviour and brought her to the clinic for counseling.

Apparently all these and many more of such Children and adolescents are singled out by the parents and their teachers as defiant kids and they are brought to us so resolve their behaviours issues and treat them for oppositional and defiant disorder . Such children are often referred to psychologists or even psychiatrists for behaviour correction because of their regular bad behaviours ,emotional adjustment problems – aggressive outbursts ,disrespect of others ,not following the norms set up by schools or families.the other issues often referred to are truancy , skipping exams ,acts or threats of self-harm, suicide attempts , running away from home .None of the parents would understand that the problem is not the outward expressive behaviour but the underlying stresses ,trauma and unhealthy family relationships ,environment or dynamics could be the cause of the unacceptable behaviour and problematic adjustment in society.

Teachers would simply complain to the parents about the non cooperative manners of child and when parents fail to correct the child by way of punishment or admonishment ,they walk into the clinic with only one expectation of “just fix my kid.”

In all such cases it has been observed that come what may the parents will simply look at the Counselor for help and magic cure without realising that the parental active participation and the school teachers pro positive approach will be more helpful along with the therapy sessions at the psychologist’

Just one way efforts by the therapist do not work with adolescents with ADHD /Dissocial behaviour / Adjustment disorder .They regress sooner to the same behaviour as soon as they return to the familiar negative environment The relapse will occur as soon as the affected adolescent returns to the same unhealthy patterns in the family /school environment.

A few changes at Joseph’s school with support from an understanding teacher helped us bring about a very positive result .The same child now has become a favourite student of all teachers . As a result of active participation by Swara’s parents Swara has become more tolerant of her parents expectations and a very healthy environment prevails at the family.

Similarly we found out that a comprehensive holistic treatment with the entire family of other children mentioned above has been very productive and effective way of treating Oppositional Defiance disorder /ADD/ADHD /Dissocial disorder without taking resort to medications.

Our experience at the Family Therapy India and Alka Mansik Pramarsh Foundation has been to go for the top down approach by involving school teachers and parents to help kids with above problems and bring about a positive changes to the defiance and anxiety of the kids .

Family is fine when kids are fine

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Understanding depression and finding a solution .

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 25, 2026| Leave a Comment »

Depression

Do you  feel sad stressed and down  sometimes,  it could be natural to have a low state of mind  for  day or two but if it  persists and  low mood lingers on for more than a week   or two it could be  depression. Major depression is an episode of sadness or apathy along with other symptoms that  stay with you  at least two weeks and  interrupt   your daily activities. Depression does not indicate weakness or   that you are a negative personality. all kinds of depression indicate some a major   health problem and needs to be treated medically .
Depression Symptoms: Emotional
The primary symptoms of depression are a  low and sad   and/or loss of interest in  day to day activities   of your  life. daily routine tasks  that were once pleasurable appear  much burdensome now .  a sense of guilt or worthlessness  prevails on the mind causing a  lack of hope, and recurring thoughts of death or suicide   can often trouble .
Depression Symptoms: Physical
Depression is sometimes linked to physical symptoms. These include:
•   tiredness, low  energy and fatigue .
•   sleeping very late in the night, early-morning waking and Insomnia.
• Excessive sleep  for long hours
• Persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment
Depression can make other health problems feel worse, particularly chronic pain. Key brain chemicals influence both mood and pain. Treating depression has been shown to improve co-existing illnesses.
Depression Symptom:  
Changes in appetite , sudden changes in the body  weight are symptoms  of depression. Increased appetite, or loss of appetite .sudden and  serious   unexplained weight loss or weight gain.

Serious effects on daily routine of life.
Depression can cause loss of  careers, and strain relationships . Nothing seems good.    there is a complete loss of interest in pleasure  activities, including sex. In severe cases, depression can become life-threatening.
Suicide ideation can be sign of warning
Suicide  ideation is common amongst the depressed.  they often indulge in   talking about death or suicide.  they can get aggressive and  threaten to hurt people. This can be serious . You can immediately call 09179383554 to speak to us If   you ever think of or idealise suicide . We will help you overcome  such negativity.
Doctors   link the cause  of depression  to  altered brain structure and chemical function.   they are of the opinion that ,”Brain circuits that regulate mood may work less efficiently during depression.although it has not been conclusively proven in any validated research.   yet the Medicines  that treat depression are  prescribed  with the belief  to improve communication between neurons , making them function  normally. Experts also think that while   traumas caused by the stress of life  can trigger depression if and when  one is biologically prone and vulnerable  to develop the disorder. depression can also be caused by long term chronic disease , lack of vitamins  ,some of the  medications, alcohol or substance abuse,   thyroid, PCOS, hormonal changes, or even the season.
Diagnosing Depression:There is no   established  lab test for depression. There are a few tests developed by psychologists , make an accurate diagnosis, where the psychologists/  doctors analyse  a patient’s description of the symptoms  over a period of past two to six months . These tests will refer to your medical history, your mood history,  and  discuss   behaviors, and daily activities  which will help reveal the severity and type of depression . The test can also reveal anxiety and stress to find out the most effective treatment for depression.
Therapy for Depression
It has been observed  that various kind of  talk therapy can fight mild to moderate depression. Cognitive behavioral therapy helps analyse and change   thoughts and behaviors that contribute to depression. Interpersonal therapy identifies how your relationships impact your mood. Psychodynamic psychotherapy helps people understand how their behavior and mood are affected by unresolved issues and unconscious feelings. Some patients find a few months of therapy are all they need, while others continue long term.
Medications for Depression
Good follow-up with your doctor is importance. If the first medication tried doesn’t help, there’s a good chance another will. The combination of talk therapy and medication appears particularly effective.

The Role of Social Support
Because loneliness goes hand-in-hand with depression, developing a social support network can be an important part of treatment. This may include joining a support group, finding an online support community, or making a genuine effort to see friends and family more often. Even joining a book club or taking classes at your gym can help you connect with people on a regular basis.
Electroconvulsive Therapy (ECT)
Another option for patients with treatment-resistant or severe melancholic depression is electroconvulsive therapy (ECT). This treatment uses electric charges to create a controlled seizure. Patients are not conscious for the procedure. ECT helps 80% to 90% of patients who receive it, giving new hope to those who don’t improve with medication.

Preksha meditation :The Perceptive Breathing Technique Helps Fight Major Depression

preksha-meditation

Preksha meditation -The Perceptive Breathing technique can   bring down  the stress hormones in the central nervous system.

Preksha meditation -The Perceptive  breathing  exercises help alleviate severe depression, as has been proved by the treatment of many patients by  us who have long been under the treatment  of  medication  administering  medicines .

Most of our  patients  , had depression that had not responded to medication  even after a long treatment .The beneficial treatment   under Preksha meditation -shwas preksha -The Perceptive Breathing Technique conducted on a large group of patients , by us in our clinic reveal that :“a large number of patients not responding to the treatment of antidepressants and SSRIs , find the new technique of controlled breathing – under Preksha Meditation  shwas preksha  much more helpful  -The Perceptive Breathing technique   had in reality worked  best for each person to treat their  severe and chronic depression. Preksha meditation -The Perceptive Breathing Technique   comes out as the short term but long lasting promising, lower-cost therapy and a , non-drug approach for patients suffering from severe depression. .”

Preksha meditation  -The Perceptive Breathing Technique   can be learnt over a series of sitting sessions of Preksha meditation -The Perceptive Breathing Technique  in our clinic over a period of two to three months and the disease can be eliminated  completely.

The technique involves a series of   perceptive rhythmic breathing exercises designed to put the mind and body of the affected  in a tranquil, calm , peaceful , purposeful  and meditative state.

How can we help you:  our regular daily  sessions of preksha meditation , Kayotsarga ,counseling sessions/mental exercises   at Mansik Pramarsh is a specialist conducted  program for managing to overcome depression   . Hundreds have benefited, it is your  turn now.   come and join .Call 09179383554 or email : mansikpramarsh@gmail.com.

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Healing Dysfunctional Family Relationships

Posted in The psychology counselling services available, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 8, 2026| Leave a Comment »

Families are often envisioned as the cornerstone of love, support, and growth. However, the reality is far more nuanced, with many families grappling with the complexities of dysfunction, unresolved conflicts, and intergenerational trauma. In this blog post, we will deep-dive into the profound impacts of dysfunctional family dynamics, exploring real-life examples and therapeutic insights to understand the journey towards healing and restoring familial harmony.

Healing Dysfunctional Family Relationships

The Ripple Effects of Dysfunction:

Meet Kritika and Vijay (names changed), whose experiences epitomize the enduring repercussions of dysfunctional family environments. Their stories resonate deeply with countless individuals who have experienced familial dysfunction. Kritika and Vijay, having weathered tumultuous family dynamics in their formative years, continue to grapple with the emotional scars, even a decade into their marriage. Their unresolved traumas have cast a long shadow over their parenting journey, as their children inherit the legacy of unresolved conflict and emotional turmoil.

Dr. Kritika, a pseudonym for a real individual, provides a poignant example of the intergenerational transmission of dysfunction. Raised amidst the daily tumult of her parents’ disputes, she and her siblings bore witness to a triangular drama that played out with agonizing regularity. Lines were drawn, allegiances shifted, and familial bonds strained under the weight of unresolved grievances. 

The ripple effects of dysfunctional family dynamics extend far beyond the immediate participants, permeating the lives of subsequent generations. Individuals like Sejal, Sonia, Kamolika, Anand, and Sumit, though fictional in name, embody the collective struggles of those who have endured traumatic family events. From PTSD and anxiety to deep-seated mistrust and unresolved phobias, the psychological toll of dysfunctional family dynamics reverberates through every facet of their lives. Moreover, their own children and spouses find themselves unwitting participants in a cycle of dysfunction, perpetuating the cycle unless intervention occurs.

Understanding Triangulation:

Central to our understanding of dysfunctional family dynamics is the concept of triangulation. What begins as innocuous interactions can quickly devolve into accusations, misunderstandings, and unresolved emotions, with family members unwittingly assuming roles as perpetrators, victims, or mediators. Left unchecked, these patterns of dysfunction can become entrenched, eroding familial bonds and hindering individual growth.

Yet, amidst the turmoil, there is hope. Through innovative therapeutic approaches, families can take on healing and reconciliation, managing past trauma to embrace a future defined by mutual understanding and support.

The Path to Healing:

At our organization, we offer a framework for addressing the underlying issues that contribute to familial dysfunction, empowering you to break free from the shackles of intergenerational trauma. Central to this process is the cultivation of empathy and understanding, both within the family unit and in the broader community.

By creating a safe space for open dialogue and honest communication, we begin the healing process, allowing individuals to confront their past traumas and head towards a brighter future. Through individual and group therapy sessions, families learn to navigate conflict constructively.

For individuals like Kritika and Vijay, the journey towards healing is challenging, but ultimately important. By confronting their past traumas and embracing a future defined by mutual respect and understanding, they lay the foundation for a closer bond.

Conclusion:

Through therapeutic support, families heal and reconcile, overcoming past trauma for mutual understanding. Together, we can break the cycle of dysfunction.

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Rejection therapy: How to Overcome Rejection and Rebuild Confidence and Trust in Self

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 18, 2026| Leave a Comment »

Neena felt desolate and lonely, and she suffered a sense of disorientation as she had been denied the job she was so confident of getting.

Rueben had completely given up after he had been passed over for a promotion, with his employer company preferring another candidate much junior to him in experience.

Tamanna felt numb and low after her boyfriend Nahar dropped her and opted for another relationship.

All these people have been denied and rejected from doing whatever they had expected or wanted to do. Some of them had worked for and invested years in reaching where they wanted to be in their careers or relationships.

Photo by http://www.kaboompics.com on Pexels.com

Many such rejections have been witnessed in recent times, where people had to leave their homes and friends abroad after being denied extensions of visas, or students had to shelve their study plans for similar reasons.

Getting rejected breaks morale. It hurts to the core too. Whether it’s being rejected by a suitor, denial of a much-awaited promotion, or a rejected job interview, rejection is not always taken in an acceptable manner. Even though people are sometimes apprehensive of hearing a “no,” they do not want to hear it for fear of not being approved.

For some people, the fear of hearing “no” becomes so strong that it stops them from taking risks or asking for what they want. Rejection sensitivity can deeply affect daily life, leading to anger, irritation, financial stress, social stress, and often much more than what is stated above.

With so many layoffs, upheavals, and shelving of long-term plans, the hopes and confidence of many are getting derailed.

Let’s understand how we can deal with rejections and the shattering of dreams and expectations, and make rejections less hurtful and more introspective in an accepting way to help rebuild mental and emotional strength and move forward. It sounds easy, but it is not. That’s where the process of “rejection therapy” plays a very positive role in rebuilding and re-emerging as a better person.

What is rejection therapy, and how does it help?

We would rather call it a reconfirming self-technique, where we undertake self-acceptance, self-expression, and a self-improvement process that we can practice on our own when needed.

In this therapy, instead of avoiding situations where we might be told “no,” we actively anticipate them without causing apprehension and anxiety.

The dynamic social environment carries a lot of grapevine, and if we pay attention to these rumours, we can expect to be either accepted, ignored, or rejected. The anticipated discomfort begins much in advance, and we can build resilience to it in smaller steps.

You start with tiny social challenges where you expect to be rejected, and then gradually build your tolerance to discomfort.

The goal isn’t to reject rejection. The exercise helps build confidence, reduce social anxiety, and not permit fear to control your life. When we realise that rejection does not mean as much as we thought—and that many people are kinder than we imagine—it becomes easier to take risks that matter.

But that doesn’t mean you should expect only negative results. Being hopeful and positive has its rewards, and that realisation brings happiness and acceptance.

Wherever you fear and anticipate rejection, acceptance can bring wonderful surprises and self-acceptance.

Gradually, the human brain learns that rejection can be worked through by looking for substitute rewards, and that rejection is not as damaging as expected.

Small steps in dealing with anticipated refusals make you more accepting and comforted. You move on in life and develop maturity and patience to bear the brunt of major challenges.

Each rejection handled with calmness and maturity builds mental and emotional strength and equips the brain with a better understanding of the subject, developing resilience and adjustment.

Rejection then becomes less painful and traumatic as you learn to manage such situations deliberately.

Rejection becomes less self-effacing and more about learning and adjustment. Your brain rewires itself to see social situations as opportunities for growth rather than threats to avoid.

If the thought of anticipated rejection or refusal causes severe anxiety, panic, or intense negative emotions, you should seek professional support from a therapist rather than trying to handle it alone. We at Alka Mansik Pramarsh Foundation can help you manage such anxiety, fear, or panic and help you move forward.

Rejection does not define your life in totality. It can be an opportunity to build a stronger future and prepare yourself to overcome the fear of rejection.

When you stop letting the possibility of hearing “no” determine your worth and start adding value to your decisions for the future, you open yourself to opportunities, connections, and experiences you might have overlooked.

You can contact us at Alka Mansik Pramarsh Foundation if you feel you need professional counselling in the following situations:

  • When your anxiety, fear, or stress worsens and causes distress
  • When you are unable to move past feelings of rejection and constantly feel sad or hopeless
  • When you experience panic
  • When you develop physical symptoms or traumatic stress linked to negative thoughts
  • When you find yourself becoming avoidant, overly self-critical, or nihilistic
  • When you feel overwhelmed or have thoughts of self-harm
  • When you are unable to carry out your day-to-day functioning

Please call or reach out to us at @mansikpramarsh. We would be glad to help you.

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Learning Disability- a fact-file

Posted in The psychology counselling services available, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 13, 2026| Leave a Comment »

 

A child -busy studying

Everybody can be distracted or daydream at different times and in different situations, but when the distraction can be beyond a set social and medical criterion these distracted behaviors become excessive and could prove problematic. The medical- psychological term for these difficulties is Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and some of the signs of this difficulty include:
  • Being easily distracted
  • Making “careless” mistakes
  • Struggling to follow instructions carefully and completely
  • Repeatedly losing things like toys, pencils, or anything you might need to complete a task

Psychiatrists   have identified that problem with attention, is often coupled with signs of hyperactivity such as:

  • Restlessness and fidgeting
  • Dashing about in situations when the child as expected to sit still and be quiet
  • Blurting out answers or interrupting others
  • Getting really frustrated if you have to wait in line or queue

The symptomatic types of signs associated with attention deficit lead to frequent wrong diagnosis of ADHD. Parents, teachers and doctors have to be keenly alert to whether signs are demonstrated across a number of situations, e.g.in school, at home, during extracurricular activities or if they are isolated to a specific subject area, which may indicate a much more specific problem.

In order to gain a formal diagnosis, psychiatrists/doctors will be looking for evidence that the problems were demonstrated early in life (before the age of 7).

Once a psychiatrist /doctor has this evidence, a full assessment, which often includes lots of different specialists, can start. However, arriving at a formal diagnosis for ADHD can sometimes be a longwinded and frustrating process. Also, because poor concentration often affects progress at school, problems can be compounded with the passing of time.

Once diagnosed, treating a child with ADHD can present a difficult choice: whether or not to   make use of medication. Other approaches include behavioral modification and management  program.

Symptomatic highlights:

Attention

  • Does your child struggle with attention and concentration?
  • Balance and Coordination Reading and Writing

It could be dyspraxia or Developmental Coordination Disorder (DCD), a condition that affects around 1 in 30 of us. Boys are at least four times more likely to be affected than girls.

There seems to be some difficulty with the way the brain processes information – it affects planning of what you want to do and how you want to do it.

Often difficulties with coordination go hand-in hand with other issues, such as difficulty with reading, Attention and Organization Skills.

For children with coordination difficulties, actions like running, jumping, balancing and cycling can prove extremely challenging. For adults, this may have translated into difficulty with driving, household chores, cooking and even getting dressed.

The tell-tale signs can be spotted at two levels.

There may be problems with gross motor coordination skills, which may result in:

  • Poor balance
  • Difficulty learning to catch and throw
  • Difficulty learning to ride a bicycle
  • Difficulty climbing stairs
  • Difficulty learning to get dressed

There may also be problems with fine motor coordination skills, including difficulty with:

  • Delicate tasks like using cutlery
  • Doing up buttons and zips
  • Tying shoe laces or ties
  • Handwriting

Often, as time goes on and children get more practice, things may become easier. In some cases, physiotherapy or occupational therapy may be appropriate.

Of all the skills we learn as children, reading and writing are among the most difficult and important. They help us build our knowledge and gain an understanding of the world.

As we get older, our ability to take in and produce written information is considered to be a fundamental skill required for success. So it is not surprising that if reading and writing prove to be difficult skills to learn, it can be a problem for the child, for their parents and for teachers at school.

For children with learning difficulties, learning to read can be an exhausting and frustrating task that simply doesn’t get any easier. In many instances, these difficulties continue into adulthood and the difficulty is hidden or avoided rather than overcome.

Lots of people take the act of reading for granted. For them it is acquired effortlessly and soon becomes second nature. But the processes involved are anything but simple! When we look at some text, a lot of physical, neurological and mental processes have to work together in order for us to make sense of what is on the page.

Our eyes have to track the text in a precise movement; nerves in our eyes take information to the brain; the brain does some special processing to convert that into language; and then that information has to be converted again into meanings.

With a process this complex, there are plenty of things that can (and do) go wrong for some people. It is not that those people are lazy or stupid. In fact they might be trying MUCH harder than other people, but it is simply that their ability to process the information, and make things become automatic, is not as efficient. Learning through practice is consequently much slower than it should be. When children are learning to read, there are a number of different signs that they might be Struggling . Signs include:

  • Difficulty sounding out words and recognizing them out of context
  • Confusion between letters and the sounds they represent
  • Difficulty reading aloud
  • Reading without expression
  • Ignoring punctuation
  • Comprehension difficulties
  • Trouble remembering or summarizing what is read

Often people who have significant problems with reading and writing will be diagnosed with dyslexia. This is no reflection on intelligence or IQ (many are bright and creative people).

People tackle difficulties with reading and writing in a number of different ways. For many, the first option is more teaching around word sounds (phonological); for others it is sound-based or visual therapy. All these routes have their merits and their success stories.

  • Do you or your child have trouble with movement and coordination?
  • Do you or your child have trouble with reading and writing?

Many people, who have taken up the Special Mansik Pramarsh Programme, tell us that their ability to focus on the task in hand improves dramatically.

People who have struggled to run without tripping up, or have never been able to ride a bike, tell us that they are able to do these activities for the first time. For others, it is more about small improvements day after day, but the overall result is similar.

We have successfully worked with thousands of people who have symptoms associated with dyslexia, dyspraxia and ADHD. Those who have completed the Programme have reported outcomes which include:

  • Improved Concentration,
  • Better Coordination, Increased Self-Confidence,
  • More Motivation for Reading and Schoolwork,
  • Improvements in Reading and Spelling Scores,
  • Enhanced Social Skills And Greater Sporting Ability

Mansik Pramarsh   program deals with what some researchers believe may be the underlying cause of learning difficulties; poor cerebellar efficiency. Our program aims to stimulate the cerebellum to improve concentration, coordination, reading, writing and the processing of information, as well as make skills become more automatic.

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High-functioning depression: Symptoms, causes, and treatments

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 11, 2025| Leave a Comment »

What is high-functioning depression?

Sudhir (name changed ) has been managing his large company for years together and didn’t believe it could happen to him when he was told by this psychologist ,” you have been suffering from high functioning depression”. “ But how is this possible ,I have been managing all my affairs well and attending to all my routine .However the family could notice him being bored quite quickly and Sudhir has of late been getting tired often ,showing signs of irritation and impatience .

Often it is believed that a high functioning individual can never be depressed or even tired because he seems to always be active ,agile and his metabolism could be working at its best .But that may not be the case always .

High-functioning people always seem to be on the drive manning not only their work but also of others work too. High functioning depression is a term used to describe people who experience symptoms of depression  while largely maintaining their daily responsibilities and outward appearance. Such high functioning individuals often are able to maintain high flying careers, professional relationships, and social lives, making it difficult even for themselves to recognize their own depressed state of mind .It could generally be taken as tiredness and distraction and they shrug it away ,when told that they could have a depression.

Is high -functioning depression a mental illness or an emotional disorder ?

The term high-functioning depression has not been officially recognised anywhere till now neither in ICD 10 or even in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5). It is thus obviously not diagnosed by your psychiatrist or a psychologist.

It’s possible for a person to meet the diagnostic criteria for major depressive disorder (MDD) or persistent depressive disorder (PDD) while hiding many of the signs and symptoms by their being busy active and over the situation.When this is the case, they may be informally described as having high-functioning depression.

Persistent Depressive disorder is a recognised mental health condition characterized by long-term, chronic bouts of depression.

High-functioning depression and PDD share similarities, but they’re not the same. The term “high-functioning depression” describes someone who mostly keeps up appearances ,despite depressive symptoms.

If you think you or a loved one may be experiencing any form of depression and feel that because of your high functioning you are not able to decide what it is , it’s important to seek professional help. A professional psychologist or a psychiatrist can provide a proper diagnosis and recommend appropriate treatment options.

Symptoms of high functioning depression

Because it’s not an official diagnosis, high-functioning depression doesn’t have distinct symptoms. Warning signs of high-functioning depression, and of depressive disorders generally, can include:

  • Persistent feelings of aloofness ,sadness  or emptiness
  • Difficulty concentrating or making decisions with clarity
  • Periodic low self esteem and self-doubts
  • Persistent fatigue or regular low energy
  • Erratic or altered sleep patterns (not able to sleep or oversleeping)
  • Change in eating habits .Appetite changes (increased or decreased)
  • Irritation or restlessness
  • Loss of interest in normally previous enjoyed activities
  • Feelings of giving up ,hopelessness or pessimism
  • Physical symptoms like headaches or digestive issues
  • Thoughts of self harm ,death or suicide .

The situation can be different for different people.Depression can look different for everyone, and you don’t need to hit a bout of actual sickness or depression. Now is the good time for you to seek help.

People with high-functioning depression may try to hide their symptoms from others, often out of fear of being judged or a feeling of embarrassment.Seeking help isn’t a sign of weakness. Even if coping with high-functioning depression seems possible on your own, you don’t need to manage without help. Treatment can help alleviate symptoms, improve quality of life, and prevent the condition from worsening over time.A person attempting to hide symptoms of depression may aggravate the problem hence let’s not delay further but talk now .

You can reach out to us

Call 7224896739 or email

mansikpramarsh@gmail.com

http://www.mansikpramarsh.com.

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Panic Attack :How to identify one and calm down during a panic attack

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 11, 2025| Leave a Comment »

When Rashi had her first panic attack she was appearing for school board exams .She didn’t know she was having one till her throat felt dry ,her hands started trembling and all of a sudden she felt she was going to faint .That made her cry out loud for help .She wanted to immediately get out of the examination hall.

However a timely intervention by the people around helped her recover faster as she was given the first aid support in time.

Panic attacks do not come with a warning and they become too scary to those who suffer one all of sudden and if a timely help is not available the same can turn a little damaging too .

Rashi did have some stress of her ensuing examination but she had also been suffering from fever for a few days and had not yet fully recovered . She had been feeling weak, a bit tired and sleepy . In this kind of stressful situation she had suddenly developed an anxiety   and lost control of mind .Her breathing seemed to have become very shallow,rapid and she had hyperventilated .

The feeling passed after little first aid support and within a few minutes she felt better although still dazed .No one knew that she had experienced her first panic attack that day, until it happened again when she was in a crowded shopping mall .

How to know if it is a panic attack

It can happen to anyone and can take place in any situation.We discuss hereunder the early signs and symptoms indicating about panic attack :

Usually it begins with a dizziness of the head and the person feels a little disoriented to the environment around .The other symptoms not necessary all of them together can be :

  • Mild pounding of heart in the middle of chest and feeling of fast heart beats
  • Shortness of breathing and feeling of suffocation
  • Breathless and major discomfort breathing even though the environment is not claustrophobic
  • Feeling a sense of numbness in the arms or legs or both
  • Chest pain
  • Hot flashes or cold sweat
  • Nausea
  • Trembling and shaking of body parts

Anxiety attack vs. panic attack

An anxiety doesn’t come all of a sudden but it builds up over time ruminating or apprehending some of the anticipated events and it remains there even when the event may not take place .Thus anxiety is triggering of the apprehension but it stays as a constant feeling disrupting the normal functioning .

A panic attack on the other hand has more debilitating effect , comes out all of a sudden and much more intense episode of fear ,anxiety and a feeling of oncoming loss of consciousness and breathing difficulty takes over .

Anxiety and panic attacks even though have similar symptoms, but panic can make one feel like one is losing control of one’s awareness,orientation .The person feels that brain and body are not coordinating . This can happen repeatedly leaving one helpless and worrying of being vulnerable all the time .Resultantly one may stop stepping out of home alone .

Some of the ways to calm down during a panic attack

Rashi was lucky when her first panic attack lasted only a few minutes and went away after help from the people around but the second time she wasn’t because it occurred in a shopping mall and help took a little longer .

Panic attacks tend to peak within a few minutes and go away also sooner but for some occasions these attacks can last longer and the person becomes restless with fear of something happening to him or her and gets panicky .

How do we control when a panic attack seems to be occurring or seems imminent:

Perceptive and Meditative Breathing;

Deep breathing has often been recommended as the compulsory activity to do when stressed .

In anxiety and panic perceptive breathing can really do magic on your mood.Lets understand how :

  1. Close your eyes softly
  2. Keep your body and spine supple and stress free
  3. Now focus on the lower end (tail end ) of your spine and breathe from the nose very slowly .The mind must be completely involved in the breathing .
  4. Inhale slowly from the nose feeling it’s impact on the lower end of the spine .
  5. Exhale slowly from the nose taking as much time as you took inhaling
  6. Continue for five to seven minutes
  7. Soon you would realise your mind and body relaxing and the anxiety level coming to almost nil .
  8. Repeat this exercise as often as you want to .

Relax your muscles and body by kayotsarga (progressive muscle relaxation exercise )

Anxiety and panic can cause your whole body to tense up making you feel uncomfortable. You can help reduce the stiffness of muscles of the body relaxing them one muscle at a time .Focus on each muscle beginning from the toes of the feet one by one and going upwards covering all parts of body one by one .An auto suggestion like ( my toes are relaxing ,my calf muscles are relaxing cover till the top of your forehead .

Move your body:yes that’s true:

Rather than sitting or lying down in panic going out for a walk or doing brisk walk in the room itself can help you bring your stress anxiety and the impending fear to a much reduced level .

Preferably you can, go for a walk outside or do some light stretching. Take yourself out of the environment that’s causing your anxiety .It will help ease your symptoms.

If you feel a panic attack coming on in a closed environment like bus ,train or an aircraft while travelling and you can’t get up and move , try these basic breathing exercises to help ground yourself and reduce the intensity of the attack.

  • Do some deep breathes and focus on the tip of your nostrils to feel the air getting in and exhaled air coming out . Soon you will feel better with diverted focus .
  • Breathe in deeply and exhale every breathe from the fingers of your feet one by one and later through each finger and toes of your hands .You will feel an ease coming to your mind and body soon.
  • Rub the palms of your hands slowly and putting the palms on your eyes later will help .

Doing this activity with your hands can help take your mind off anxiety a calmness sets in .

Repeat positive affirmations to yourself

A positive affirmation is a phrase or a sentence you repeat to yourself over and over but if you can write it and read it aloud ,the impact is many times more and empowering .

The statement can be

“ I am a calm person I am a powerful person “

or “I am a powerful person I can handle this situation “

Or “ I am a powerful person I have the power of mind “ .

Reading and saying these affirmations out loud can help, but if you’re in a public place and don’t feel comfortable with that, just say it silently to yourself. Make sure to read or speak the words slowly in your mind.

Get help of psychologist /Counselor

In order to prevent repeated occurrences ,you must seek the help of a psychologist .You can reach out to us at

Alka Mansik Pramarsh Foundation

http://www.mansikpramarsh.com

Family Therapy India

http://www.familytherapyindia.com

Or email

mansikpramarsh@gmail.com

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Autism Spectrum Disorder: Managing Behavioral Difficulties in ASD Children

Posted in daily writings and musings of the psychologist, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 10, 2021| Leave a Comment »

We regularly get queries from young parents asking for support to understand the behaviour of their wards suffering from Autism Spectrum Disorder and the behaviour difficulties faced by the affected children.

Children suffering from ASD have behaviour issues which are quite common. These issue relate to more about their communication, social interaction,working within the structured schedule and processing of the sensory information.However if parents are trained and equipped with the appropriate strategies , much of the stress and strain can be reduced bringing relief to the family and the child.They can often be managed through effective activity and behavior management.

There are many difficulties, ASD children face in their behaviour. These issues can be identified as difficulties in communication, issues of  sensory processing, social interaction, and physical balance issues that can make active play more difficult for these kids. Parents and caregivers need to understand that  such behaviours as appear inappropriate are in reality symptoms of the difficulties the child with ASD is facing in his her day to interaction and communicate with others .

Understanding the Causes of Inappropriate Behaviour

The main causes of behavioral difficulties are generally as follows:

Difficulties with communication: Children with ASD struggle with both verbal and expressive language, understanding what is being said to them, and comprehending non-verbal communication cues. This can, become quite frustrating for both the communicator and the child .The child may not be into problem behaviour but to the other person it would appear so ,which causes frustration at both ends.

Difficulties with social situations: The difficulties presented by social situations for a person with ASD are much more than mere communication; people with ASD struggle to understand others’ points of view and grasp the “unspoken rules” of social interaction that state when to, begin and when end a conversation. They are in no position to get the emotional nuances of social communication. Due to all of this, children with ASD may avoid social contact, and they are more likely to experience being harrassed and feel overwhelmed by unnecessary intervention by others in their life .

Difficulties with unstructured time: People with ASD have a hard time dealing with situations where there is no set schedule, as their brains have a hard time sequencing activities on their own out of the given timetable and schedule. Due to this some of the children with ASD are more likely to act out during the period which is not scheduled earlier eg.free period or suddenly declared break times, as they feel confused and frustrated.

Difficulties processing sensory information: Those with ASD often have over or under-sensitive senses, leading to a tendency to get overwhelmed or to seek attention to such a degree that it becomes embarrassing for the accompanying parent and the person interacting with the child.. ASD affected child may react strongly to an unwanted touch, be very selective and particular food eater, get largely disturbed and irritated by loud noises ( be it a noise coming from far off .The child feels unable to concentrate on account of background noise and reacts adversely.

Additionally, one should always remember that people with ASD do not easily adapt to change.Parents managing their ASD ward should be aware of the changes being brought about in their environment or schedule that can trigger problem behaviours.A sudden bout of Illness (especially seizures, which ASD individuals may be prone to) can also trigger adverse reactions as the child with ASD cannot give verbal expression to his or her pain. Doctors advise parents to use picture posters or diagrams to help children express where they are feeling pain.

Dealing with Problem Behaviour

It’s key to understand that the child is using these behaviours to try to communicate something to you, or to achieve some specific function. It’s vital to look under the surface of these behaviours so as to discover the unaddressed needs below. Try to asses what you child is trying to tell you, rather than reacting to the behaviour itself (resist “punishing”; few ASD children actually understand the cause and effect implied by it). It’s also advised to keep a “behaviour diary” or chart so that one can identify patterns in a child’s behaviour and from there, isolate what’s triggering the child’s episodes. One can then develop strategies to avoid or manage the triggers (be sure to introduce these slowly, as sudden changes in routine will do more harm than good). Likewise, expect the child to initially resist the change; stay patient and be consistent with it regardless, and make sure that other family members, teachers, and caregivers are also keeping consistent with it.

One should also develop supportive therapies to help the child shed his or her frustration; these typically include: exercise, brief time out periods in a quiet, darkened space, and relaxing activities. Set achievable treatment goals and don’t push too hard for rapid improvement, as people with ASD can struggle to integrate new knowledge and change behaviours.

To get the best out of a child with ASD, it’s often helpful to employ the following strategies:

  • Speak clearly and precisely (and use short sentences) in order to work around the difficulties that arise with complex verbal communication.
  • Use visual supports. Many children with ASD process visual information more easily than other forms of information. Timetables can be helpful to assist children in understanding schedules.
  • Create “social stories”. These are brief descriptions (using words and images) of situations, events, or activities that help tell a child with ASD what to expect during an upcoming social situation.
  • Help the child identify his or her emotions. This is often challenging to a child with ASD; use visual aids (such as “stress scales”) to help the child quantify what he or she is feeling and how intensely, and help the child learn via physical associations, such as showing him or her that anger connects to a reddening of the face, stomach pain, the urge to cry, etc.
  • Help them learn to relax. Children with ASD find it hard to relax, and can be very “intense” and obsessive in their interests. Try to work relaxing activities or some quiet “alone time” into his or her daily routine.
  • Make their environment more soothing. As children with ASD can become overwhelmed by sensory information, it’s important to ensure their environments are as free as possible of sensory irritants. Flickering lights, devices that give off background noise, scented candles, etc., should be removed.
  • Give praise, in the form your child likes best. Praise is as important to an ASD child’s learning as it is to most children’s learning, but depending on their unique needs, praise may have to be modified to suit the child. For example, some may not like hugs, some may not recognize verbal praise. Often visual cues like stickers on charts or time doing a favourite activity as a reward are effective forms of praise. Praise should be as immediate as possible so that the child can assess cause and effect.

Seeking Help

 If your child’s behaviour is placing him or herself at risk, or others at risk, you should seek professional help by a psychologist or psychiatrist, rather than trying to handle the situation on your own.

(more…)

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